Yikes! I haven't posted since January!
Well, to give a quick update on what has been going on in our lives: we have since had 2 healthy twin boys born at 38 weeks (7lbs 2oz and 6lbs 15oz). And, really, that's it. Babies take up a lot of time, especially breastfeeding. But I want to encourage all of you who are pregnant with multiples or nursing multiples, it can be done and it does get easier! There are days where I feel like everything is an insurmountable goal and there are days where it's a piece of cake. Just stick tight, you can do it. Even as I'm writing I am rocking my two non nappers because it's the only way I can get them to nap for any length of time.
If you're anything like me you feel like everybody else has a better handle on life. Everybody else has kids that nap well and sleep through the night and eat all their good healthy food that that they in all their perfectness are able to whip up everyday. The house is all in order, the babies don't spit up and the 2 year old sits quietly and always says, "please." And those thoughts depress you and shame you and, if left alone, make you BELIEVE that you aren't good enough. And it doest have to be motherhood issues, it could be anything.
I have the privilidge of having a husband who is willing to snap me back into reality. He's not afraid of a negative response from me. This weekend he shared a video with me from Pastor Francis Chan's wife, Lisa. She was speaking about BEING STILL. Women have a problem being still. I don't know a single woman who doesn't gave a constant running list in her head of things she needs to get done and wants to get done. Having a list is fine, but we let it CONTROL us. "The kids are finally down for a nap, I need to clean this dump." *baby wakes up before the first task is done* "Ugh, why? I have all these things I need to do!" *nurse, nurse, nurse* "hurry up, your brothers are still sleeping, I can still get a chance to..." *other baby wakes up* "never mind." Then daddy gets home we frantically try to make dinner, force the 2 year old to eat it and choke down a little crunchier than aldente pasta ourselves, pile the dishes in the sink that you'll "get to later" because the baby(ies) want mommy milk. *nurse, nurse, nurse* BED TIME!! "Finally, I can get something done!" But the husband wants to relax with you and the couch is calling you. You assure him that you just want to get one thing done quick. But onething turns into 5 things simultaneously and none of them get accomplished to your idea of "done" before your annoyed husband asks you, again, to sit with him.
Is it bad to want to have "it all"? A clean house, happy healthy kids and a good marriage? It's not too much to ask, right? Well, that's just the problem. We aren't asking, we're just doing. We aren't BEING STILL like Mary (Luke 10) but frantic like Martha.
Christian mother, what is your goal? Is it to keep up with this idea of perfection that you have made up that only stresses you out or is it to raise your kids to love and serve the Lord and have a marriage that sets an example of Christ's love for the church? Being still before the Lord isn't being LAZY, it's being productive!! You're setting yourself before God to LISTEN and PRAY and WORSHIP.You'll find that after you start choosing the quiet time, your day just works out better. Maybe it's God rewarding you with excellent nap times(!) Or maybe your perspective has been elevated. Either way, it's a better day!
Be still before the Lord.
