Eve Came From Adam: Part 4

Genesis 2:18-25 18 Then the Lord God said, “It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper who is just right for him.” 19 So the Lord God formed from the ground all the wild animals and all the birds of the sky. He brought them to the man to see what he would call them, and the man chose a name for each one. 20 He gave names to all the livestock, all the birds of the sky, and all the wild animals. But still there was no helper just right for him.

21 So the Lord God caused the man to fall into a deep sleep. While the man slept, the Lord God took out one of the man’s rib and closed up the opening. 22 Then the Lord God made a woman from the rib, and he brought her to the man.

23 “At last!” the man exclaimed. “This one is bone from my bone and flesh from my flesh! She will be called ‘woman,' because she was taken from ‘man.’”

Since the fourth and fifth point go hand in hand and the sixth point is more of a funny thought than an actual point, I will be combining them in this post.

The woman came from the man's side, so as a man protects his flesh and cares for his flesh, so he should care for his wife.

She came from his side. His rib to be exact. Not his foot, not his shin, not his forehead, but his side. Right under the armpit. That's why it stinks to be a woman. Just kidding. But seriously, men are stinky.

The Bible uses imagery to display a deeper meaning to things sometimes. In the New Testament, Jesus spoke in parables, which are stories with purposeful meanings. I believe the placement of the rib cage is significant in this passage. It is right by his side which signifies equality and it is below his arm which signifies protection. For those of you who are thinking to yourselves, "Yes! Women's rights! Go feminism!" I say, "Chill." While you are equal in many ways, you are still not to rule over your household or over your husband. You are not held responsible the same way he is, so the final decision should be left up to him. Though you can and still have input in the decision making process. And with most things, you should be able to come to an agreement. But just like when you were a kid and you had to babysit your siblings and you had chores to get done before your parents got home. You were made responsible. You had to make sure the kitchen got cleaned up. If the other kids made a bad choice and didn't do what they were supposed to do, you got in trouble for it. Same goes for marriage, only it's your husband's butt on the line and God is the one he has to answer to. Do your job, have equal say, submit to his final decision. Once he realizes he has your trust and you depend on him to make good choices, he will make better ones. Keep encouraging him, but stop belittling him. The more you treat him like a fool, the more foolish decisions he will make. A man thirsts for his wife's respect. Many men confuse "having respect" with "having control". So, when he doesn't get your respect and your trust, he will tend to make more fool hearty decisions without your input because he wants to prove he's a man. You want a smarter, wiser husband? Treat him like he already is one. Ask for his advice. He needs to be needed, even if he doesn't know it.

And now for the topic of protection...being under his arm. This is not only physical protection, but also emotional and spiritual protection.

Now that women, on average, wait longer to get married, they spend more time in the world learning to protect themselves. It used to be that a woman went right from her father's protection into her husband's protection, so she didn't have to learn to shield herself from the cold world. I think that's why women get bitter so easily and, generally, hold grudges easier than men. We weren't made to shield ourselves from all the fiery darts the world throws at us. We were made with tender hearts and compassionate spirits. We see puppies or baby anything and we say, "Awww...", because they are soft and cute and that is our natural maternal instinct that we were created with. When that gets snuffed out by us "protecting ourselves", we get short with our children and fight off our husbands. We need to actively learn to let our shields down and let our husbands protect us. It's their job. They're men. They are built stronger than us for a reason. It's because men were meant to carry the shields for us, lift them up when necessary and let them down otherwise. Women were not meant to cement their shields in place around their hearts because they are too heavy to keep lifting up and putting down.

Physical protection is obvious and easy. I think that is on every woman's list of characteristics she wants her husband to have. But emotional and spiritual protection will only work if you allow yourself to trust him with your heart completely. In spiritual protection, he will be in charge of making sure you only get fed the truth, that you are in a church that is doctrinally sound, and that you pray and have devotions together. If these things aren't taking place in your home, don't get mad at him, blame your mother in law. JUST KIDDING! Don't do that. It's not her fault. She did the best she could. lol But really, don't get mad at him. He might not know that is part of his role. Talk with him about it and help it get started.

Emotional protection is probably the hardest to surrender to him. Let's be honest, we have all gone through some hard things in our lives. Whether it's abuse, neglect, parents divorcing, financial stress, past relationships we've had, people that we love getting hurt or sick or dying. And hard things will continue to happen for the rest of our lives. Don't be afraid of having emotions and letting your husband see them. Don't expect him to always respond perfectly, the way you want him to, especially at first. You're new at sharing and he's new at listening. And because he's a man, his initial response will be, "How do I fix this?" Be patient with him and allow him to get close and help you heal and build a deeper, more trusting relationship with your husband. It will take time. So give it time.